i always think tat i really need a break to freshen up my mind, or maybe, just being lazy. . . after this 4 days break, i hav enough rest and time to do wat i intended to do, well, in the end i kind of. . . screwed it up, i started to realise tat my future is actually starting now, my so called fascinating.happy.ending future. every dollar i earn is for my basic human need. i miss the everything surrounded me, i need someone, i don know who might it be, at least i hav someone specific to talk to when i was alone, or maybe tired lying on the bed and cant even move my limbs but only my mouth, i still able to blame all the thing i've encounted today with u, or, maybe just lean on the shoulders without any words but holding hands. . . or, maybe everytime when i was disturb in wat to eat, at least someone can share thought with me giving me some idea,or there is someone give me a kiss everytime i reached home and makes me feel like everyday will become a thanks giving day, or maybe after the party when everybody has gone, but only u will stay and swicth off the light. . .